How To Start A Conversation Online
You have a nice online dating profile with a decent description, enough details that highlight your strong personal traits, and eye-catching photos. You even chose a perfect lady with the same values and attractive appearance. Seems like the stars aligned, and you already think about your successful dates. However, here comes the most difficult part — starting the conversation. While lots of men still struggle to get the reply from their chosen ones, here are four to-do steps about how to start a conversation on online dating websites. This will help you break the ice and get that desired “Hello.”
How to start a conversation on an online dating website: realities & expectations
Quite often, it seems that only being signed up on online dating websites is already proof of readiness for active communication and sometimes building relationships. However, statistics prove that men need to send five times more messages than women to get a single response. Precisely, more than 25 messages are needed before the first dialogue.
With such rates, online dating doesn’t sound to be an easy process. Especially if you are a man craving to write to an attractive woman. However, don’t worry. While most online dating members go on thinking that there is nothing they can do, the truth is another. Improving the quality of your messages raises your chances of meeting a soulmate much easier and quicker. And here is a simple though reliable guide on making a real splash in your message box without sending hundreds of emails.
Rule 1: How to start a conversation online if you are complete strangers?
So, how to start a conversation on an online dating site? If you have ever tried messages of the kind “Hey, baby, you look so nice,” you should know that they are the first ones in your list...to avoid. Not only is it cliché, but it also doesn’t invite any meaningful conversation. Instead of focusing principally on physical characteristics, try to find something that will hint about her personality. Photos can reflect her lifestyle and the way she wants to present herself to strangers. Does a woman have lots of pics from trips? Travelling must be pretty much her favorite pastime. Write your first message asking about her favorite trip or future plans. Lots of photos while practicing extreme kinds of sports? Even if you are not so much into that, it’s your perfect opportunity to find out more.
So, before engaging in the conversation, scan for some intel, skim through the profile and write the message that will make her want to answer.
Rule 2: How to write the right message and ask meaningful questions?
The key to the first message’s success is already known — get all the details and ask the right question. So, is it all? Can you stop wondering about how to start an online dating conversation with a girl? No. You also need to understand how to ask questions correctly. Avoid any filler or interview-style questions. Instead of asking about how your date spent her day or what she is looking for, think about something funnier and more original. Probably, she gets dozens of the same questions every day, so a nice opener will actually help to stand out and attract her attention. If you discovered that you have any common interests, use it without any doubts. If not, set up a situation in which she will gladly share everything important to her.
Rule 3: Avoid copy & paste messages and be attentive to her profile details
No one wants to feel like just another one on the list. That’s why writing an original message is essential. Of course, some effective and interesting starters can perfectly work without deeper investigation. However, if she indicated in her profile that she hates cats, you can obviously miss a question in the style of “Are you a cat or a dog person?” So, be attentive to details. They can not only be the key to successful communication, but also a great test of your genuine interest in her.
Rule 4: Don’t be afraid to follow-up or change the subject
Let’s be honest, even the greatest couples ever didn’t start so smooth. Sometimes, people can be just too busy answering on online dating websites. In other cases, a message can simply get lost. Sending a follow-up email (not in the stalking or too pushing way, though) can be a good strategy.
Also, even if you planned your communication but the topic doesn’t seem to break all the ice, feel free to change it at any time. Not all the subjects run its natural course, but if you are matched with a bright and not-selfish person, you will likely find lots of other mutually interesting topics to discuss.
Frequently Asked Questions
How to ask a personalized question without being too forward?
Think about the questions you would like to answer. Even though all people have different boundaries, most people won’t mind replying about their hobbies, preferences, education, or even job. As for too private questions, save them till you are close enough.
How to keep the conversation interesting?
When communicating with a complete stranger, remember that you can actually discuss all the things in this world. Even if you both seem too shy, any reply can be followed by the question “And what about you?” Even this simple gesture not only presents you as a good listener but also helps to get the conversation on a roll.
Should I comment on physical looks?
Most women like compliments and attention. However, when it comes to your attention to their appearance, it may not go your way. Primary focusing on the face or body shape can lead to the wrong impression about your goals and intentions. All ladies want to feel that their personalities and intellect are appreciated, even if they look like they are just back from the last beauty pageant.