Making Long Distance Relationship Work
The Complexity of Long Distance Relationships
The million-dollar question many are asking, whether considering a long-distance relationship or already dating someone from afar is: do long distance relationships work? Well, my own personal experience, along with research and expert insights, can attest to the fact that they do. Despite the distance, my husband and I have been in a long-distance relationship since we met in the Galapagos. Today, we are happily married with a one-year-old son.
It’s important to acknowledge that every type of relationship, including long-distance ones, have their unique challenges. One of the best tips for maintaining a successful long-distance relationship is understanding that distance is temporary and finding ways to compensate for the distance can make your long-distance relationship work.
Insights from Research on Long-Distance Relationships
Research shows that long-distance relationships can be just as satisfying as geographically close relationships. One might think that physical intimacy or time spent together in person is the key to relationship health. However, distance can sometimes strengthen the bond between partners, as it encourages communication and emotional intimacy.
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An intriguing fact is that approximately three million Americans live apart from their spouse at some point during their marriage, demonstrating the prevalence of long-distance relationships. Moreover, 75% of college students have been in a long-distance relationship, further proving that many long-distance relationships do work.
Making a long distance relationship work & keeping a flame alive
Here you are. Five hours in a car from each other or 10 hours by plane, with no time difference or in completely different zones, having different native languages or sharing different cultures. Even if the idea of being in different countries and continents sounds crazy, it can work if you want it to happen, and you are ready to work on it. So, let’s find out how to make your heart grow fonder during LDR rather than let it “out of mind, out of sight.”
Quality communication in international long distance relationship
Communication is an essential part of every relationship. But you need to accept, in a long distance relationship, communication will become the key to maintaining your love. Most importantly, it should be high-quality communication with your common routines like writing “good night” before sleep or saying a thousand goodbye before hanging up. Add photos, videos, voice messages, and make regular phone and video calls. What can you also do? Borrow some interesting idea from the list:
- Binge-watch Netflix together
- Cook and have dinner
- Exercise through video calls
- Go for a “walk”
- Choose one book and read it simultaneously, then share your thoughts.
Sometimes, living in different time zones may cause difficulties with catching each other, so knowing schedules and planning time wisely is another must-do. Finally, update your long distance partner about your everyday life and achievements. Even if these details can seem so mundane, this flow of messages will help your beloved feel like nothing is missing in your relationship, and you actually exist in the lives of each other.
Sharing the same goals and endgames
Even before starting a relationship, you need to define: how long will your long distance status last? Researchers prove that it’s much easier to deal with being apart when you know that it will be over soon. What happens if one partner can’t bear being in limbo anymore, while the other doesn’t precipitate the moment of moving together? Can an internatioanl long distance relationship work then? There is bound to be friction. That’s why it’s essential to discuss your aims, expectations, and potential outcomes.
Trust and honesty
One of the most common reasons one feels like stopping it all is a lack of trust in their partners. Even the least jealous person can start to feel unsure in LDR. Friends and close people who whisper to you how lack of physical connection can lead to infidelity don’t make things easier, too. How to gain trust in your beloved other when you have thousands of miles between you? How to work out a long distance relationship and keep trust? First of all, if your love is truly mutual, honesty should be the core base of everything. Second, discuss any insecurities or worries. Sometimes the call that you planned in advance is missed not because the person doesn’t love you anymore, but just because of a simple blackout or accidental nodding-off.
Fulfilling your love languages
If you actually want to work on your international long distance relationship and maintain it, make sure to pay attention to your soulmate’s love language. Whether it’s quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, or physical touch, all of the love languages can be fulfilled to a certain extent. Of course, sending her romantic postcards and ordering pizza or writing support texts and expressing your pride about their success is easier than showing your love through physical touches. However, everything is possible with your desire to make your partner feel loved and a little bit of thinking out of the box.
The Role of Technology in Long-Distance Relationships
In the age of technology, couples in long-distance relationships have a plethora of tools to stay connected. Video calls, for example, can play a critical role in maintaining a long-distance relationship. The ability to see your partner, even virtually, can help you feel more connected, adding a sense of proximity to your interactions.
Another tool is texting, which allows partners to communicate throughout the day. Little things like sharing updates about your day or sending loving messages can go a long way toward maintaining the relationship’s quality.
Lastly, social media platforms can be useful for sharing life moments and staying in the loop with each other’s lives. They offer a way to feel part of your partner’s life, despite being in different cities.
Overcoming Challenges in Long-Distance Relationships
While the success of long-distance relationships (LDRs) has been validated, it’s undeniable that such arrangements pose certain challenges that geographically close relationships may not experience. Physical intimacy, a crucial aspect of romantic relationships, is often constrained in LDRs. However, many long-distance couples might argue that the lack of physical intimacy can result in enhanced emotional bonding and communication.
One of the best tips on making a long-distance relationship work is to perceive the distance as an opportunity rather than a hurdle. The space and time apart from one another, while difficult, can cultivate independence, personal growth, and a deeper appreciation for your partner. Always remember, the distance is temporary, and your reunions will be something to look forward to.
How to make an international long distance relationship work: meetings in a real-life
What really fuels up your feeling, makes you have butterflies in the stomach, and evokes all the best memories is the expectation of a forthcoming meeting. Some couples make a commitment to never let more than a specific period go by without an in-person visit. Other couples are forced to obey the circumstances and decide on-the-go. Still, there should be a motivation to wait and know that soon you will meet your beloved again. Even if international long distance relationship trips cost a pretty penny, it’s definitely paid off.
Conclusion: The Potential for Long-Distance Relationships
So, do long-distance relationships work? Yes, they do, provided both partners are committed to making it work. Although it comes with its own set of challenges, dating long distance is not a death sentence for your love life. With the right mindset, ample communication, and a dash of creativity, LDRs can transform into a meaningful, intimate relationship. As we move more and more into the digital age, long-distance relationships are more common than ever. It might require a bit more effort and a lot of trust, but as the saying goes – “Distance means so little when someone means so much
Can long-distance relationships last?
Yes, long-distance relationships can last if both partners are committed and communicate effectively. Clinical sexologist Lucy Rowett emphasizes the importance of clear communication and understanding each other’s values. So, as long as you’re willing to put in the effort, long-distance relationships can work.
What percentage of long-distance relationships work?
The success rate of long-distance relationships is approximately 58%. Research shows that 55% of individuals in such relationships worry about their partners meeting someone else. Shockingly, only 2% of high school relationships manage to endure the challenges of distance.
What are the red flags in a long-distance relationship?
Red flags in long-distance relationships are often associated with commitment, trust, and communication. Examples include a lack of conversation initiation, draining communication, and frequent unproductive arguments. Monitoring these warning signs is crucial for the health of a long-distance relationship.
